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Alani-Who? Are Alani Nu Protein Shakes Really the Best on the Market?

Updated: Apr 22

Many of us recognize Alani Nu for their unique and refreshing sugar-free energy drink flavors. Regardless of whether you are drinking them during work hours, before the gym, or during travel, they always hit the spot. But are they the among the best protein shakes on the market?


Their tropical flavors are eerily accurate and taste quite sweet. It almost makes one feel as though they are lounging at a luxury resort drinking a Piña colada when in reality you are drinking a Gastroenterologist's worst nightmare throughout your day in your corporate job to gear yourself up for leadership's next pizza party.


Alani Nu has also become popular amongst the fitness industry, especially Tiktok influencers, fit-girls, and "rizzed up" jabronis with curly hair. These invaluable contributors to society are seemingly always promoting the brand, and these lovely drinks can be found at your nearest gas station and local super market.


However, as someone that suffers from chronic tummy aches, I tend to shy away from drinking carbonated energy drinks, but I still have the occasional Alani Nu, Celsius, or Monster. I've shifted towards uncarbonated energy drinks and tea, but still love me a Hawaiian Shaved Ice from time-to-time.


I'm a sucker for protein shakes though, especially those that have intriguing flavors. One can only have so many vanilla and chocolate Muscle Milks, and they taste closer to chalk than an actual shake. As you can imagine, when I came across these protein shakes at Costco, I had to fight my way through the crowd to grab a pack.


Anyone trying to incorporate more protein into their diet will probably tell you how challenging it can be to hit your goals, and there are very few people that can eat 6 chicken breasts and a half-dozen eggs in a single day. As a result, we have turned to supplementing our daily protein requirements through shakes, and this has been a huge hit with the fitness industry over the past few decades.


Alright, enough fluff, let's get into the review. I've tried 4 of Alani Nu flavors; Vanilla, Cookies & Cream, Munchies, and Fruity Cereal. We're Costco guys, and w're going to give these flavors a numerical rating AND either a "BOOM" or a "DOOM" (ifkyk)


Classic Vanilla

Alani Nu Vanilla Fit Shake

Vanilla is really as plain as it gets for protein shakes. Alongside chocolate, this is a classic flavor and is generally pretty hard to screw up. I was excited to try this one, and candidly, it was underwhelming. The flavor profile was VERY artificial, and tasted similar to both the Premier Protein and Muscle Milk brands, which is not a compliment. I will say that it was noticeably sweeter, and actually mixed well with frozen fruit (I suggest berries or mangos). Overall, nothing really special, but maybe slightly better than their competitors (with the exception or Fairlife).


I'll give this a 6.7 and a DOOM!


Cookies & Cream

Cookies & Cream Alani Nu Fit Shake

If you don't like Oreos, I'll help you pack. Seriously, these are the best processed cookies and that's the end of the discussion. If you aren't slightly excited by the prospect of a Cookies & Cream protein shake, I don't know what to tell you. This shake is great, sweeter than the vanilla flavor with hints of cream filled cookies. It's subtle, and hits the spot. I've seen lots of protein powder brands mess this one up, so my expectations were low. I was impressed though, and would probably buy this one again.


This flavor receives a 7.6 and a BOOM!


Munchies?!

Alani Nu Munchies Fit Shake

When I initially saw this flavor, I was a bit overwhelmed. It's chocolate chip cookie flavored, with pretzels, and... is that nacho cheese? It was challenging at first to discern what that mysterious golden sauce was on the pretzel, but though the power of deduction (and Reddit) I was able to confirm that it is in fact caramel. Now this is riveting. I started to picture a salted caramel protein shake and I became slightly aroused (pause?).


If you've ever been to a Starbucks, it's well known that their Iced Caramel Macchiato is an elite beverage. Sure, it has nearly half of your daily recommended sugar intake (DRI for our fitness guru's), but it really is one of the best iced coffees you can get from a franchise fast food joint. I simply had to try this one, and it was excellent. I drank one for the first time after lifting weights and it hit the spot. I even had one the next day with two shots of espresso over ice, making an iced coffee with 20 grams of protein! It was just amazing, an Iced Caramel Macchiato without any guilt.


Munchies gets an 8.2 and a BOOM!


The best for last - Fruity Cereal

Alani Nu Fruity Cereal Fit Shake

As embarrassing as it is to say, I was absolutely delighted to have this one. I've been trying to find this flavor for months, and was tracking it down the same way a detective tracks down a Serial Killer (this one's for you Justin). This is what life is like now as a man in his mid-twenties. I'm now excited about the prospect of purchasing new kitchen appliances or trying a cereal flavored protein shake. Anyhow, I had to try this one because I assumed it tasted like the milk in a cereal bowl after you finished your fruit loops. That was simply just the best milk in the world, and if you didn't get to experience drinking it as a kid while watching Looney Tunes or playing Mario Sunshine, I am truly empathetic. This shake was exactly that, it really tasted like fruity loops flavored milk, and I cannot have been more satisfied. This is a flavor I would absolutely buy again, as is on par with Fairlife shakes. It was worth the wait and I highly recommend trying if you like fruit flavored cereal.


We saved the best for last, giving this one an 8.6 and a BOOM!

Thank you all for reading my spiel, the bottom line is that the Alani Nu shakes can compete with their competitors and their unique flavors are creative and a refresh to the plain flavors we have been used to in the past. Overall, I think Fairlife shakes are a bit better, but they don't have the same variety.
 
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